Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Zombiefit - Fitness to Survive the Apocalypse

Just how fit are you?

Fit enough to go for a quick jog around the park without collapsing in a wheezing heap? Perhaps fit enough to lift weights for an hour, a couple of times a week? Or maybe you're not fit at all, and your sole daily exercise involves a PC, a mouse and impressive index finger strength?

Well, ask yourself - if Zombie Apocalypse occurred today - would you be able to survive? With hordes of slobbering, slavering zombies lurching down every street, ready to sink their teeth into you with no hesitation, it would very much be a case of survival of the fittest...

Enter Zombiefit from St. Charles, Illinois, who seem to have taken their inspiration from a quote from Zombieland "First rule of Zombieland: Cardio" and built an entire exercise regime around it.

Zombiefit is all about getting functionally fit - there is, after all, no point being a bodybuilder with bulging biceps and a chiselled torso when you spend much of your day running away from flesh-hungry zombies. They describe the concept:

"The keys to surviving Z-day are simple: Be able to lift and throw heavy things, run fast and for long distances, and be able to navigate obstacles and urban environments in an efficient manner."

While I applaud the initiative of this fitness club I have a feeling that they are leading their members to feel dangerously overconfident on that fateful day when the dead rise and start munching their way through the general populace. After all, running will only get you so far - there comes a time when you are trapped in a corner and have to fight your way out. In such moments, all your fancy parkour moves aren't going to help you much...

It would seem the organisers have perhaps missed a trick by failing to give training for repetitive arm movements (i.e. swinging an axe at zombie heads, pumping a shotgun repeatedly), long distance throwing (i.e. molotov cocktail into a packed mass of zombies) - not to mention holding a heavy object for large lengths of time (i.e. a chainsaw). Adding in such elements would, I'm sure you'll agree, go some way to turning this course from a useful one into an essential one...

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